Sanctuary: the place for speculative fiction in a modern world.

Why are all science fiction shows chock full of the scary business? I had been seeing ads for the new show Sanctuary for months before it appeared, so my anticipation was high. I couldn’t watch even 30 minutes of the pilot. Too much darkness with things jumping out. Hollywood seems to think of science fiction as a haunted house and I read science fiction and fantasy to explore interesting ideas like interactions between vastly different cultures. So I think of sff more like anthropology or politics or history. You don’t hear anthropologists and historians going around passing judgement before they have researched or talked to people. Assuming things that are different are going to be scary is a very non-sff concept, one I think is bad for society as a whole. Many people who read science fiction want to become scientists (despite the way scientists frown upon fictional science and its readers, there are a lot of people who treat their reading preferences as a dirty little secret) because they want to know more. If the books were all about how scientists’ need to know destroys the Earth and kills everyone, wouldn’t that discourage some of the brightest people? Many people who read some of the great modern fantasy absorb tolerance— I don’t know anyone who has read and liked Lackey’s Valdemar series who really thinks being homosexual is a killing offense, there are some who are still skeeved if they think about it too much, but we all got to know Vanyel and it’s hard to think he deserved to be tortured because he wasn’t attracted to women.

Personally I’ve read books that started from an Islamic basis, the story wasn’t about that, but there was an underlying premise. I got to know a little bit about what the differences are compared to my own upbringing. I find it impossible to assume every Muslim is inherently a terrorist. Because the fundamental core beliefs are not about that.  But if the story had been about being a woman in Saudi Arabia, I would have been too angry to keep reading and then I would have no connection to the characters.

Science fiction and fantasy differ in what powers everything, but they are both fundamentally about exploration of the human condition, regardless of shape or color or background or belief.

Hollywood’s tendency to make all science fiction and fantasy scary enough to be horror really undermines the globalization of society. Hollywood is trying to make us afraid of each other by making everything that is different jump out of the darkness with guns blazing.

It makes the title of the new show Sanctuary rather ironic.

Forbidden Kingdom

Forbidden Kingdom
a fantasy/kung-fu movie
IMDb | Netflix
Overall Rating: 4/10
Meets Expectations: +2
Apparent Rating: 6/10

This is my kind of story. I did not think it would be because I have very little enthusiasm for kung-fu as a movie genre. But the story was about a young man in the inner city who is transported to this magical realm while unconscious from a fight.

While he’s there, he learns to fight in several animal styles of kung fu fighting and completes a quest to save the world. He learns what it is to sacrifice for his friends, what it costs the hero to save the world, how to have deep feelings for a woman, and what the bonds connecting him to others mean. He becomes a man and we can see it.

It’s probably my favorite plot.

Unfortunately it’s really badly implemented here. Jackie Chan comes off a lot like Shaggy in the Scooby Doo movies. Jet Li is well, I’m not really sure which character was Jet Li, but all the other ones were cardboard. The girl manages to sound like she doesn’t speak English and we’re supposed to believe she’s stoically trying to avenge her family, but mostly she sounds retarded because she speaks of herself in the third person. The worst part about this is the pacing. The story can’t develop because we rush through all the plot to watch yet another ridiculous fight scene. And the fight scenes are all “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” style where suddenly they have lunar gravity for no apparent reason, so it’s stupid and pointless and wastes gobs of film time.

If we had actually seen the story told, with the building of personality so the characters’ motivations were clear, that would have been an awesome experience.

Some of the humorous parts of the movie require external knowledge of previous kung fu classics, so unless you have seen some of the Drunken Master series, or the ones with Aunt 13, or whatever that one with the emperor of the desert was, you’re not going to get the joke. But the dialog and most of the scenes are blocked with the intent that the audience is going to be laughing along with the cast. I did not find it even vaguely humorous, even when I got the joke.

This was a great story, wasted on this telling. I enjoyed it, but you probably won’t. If you’re a fan of kung fu movies, you’re likely going to be offended by their tongue-in-cheek treatment of the genre. If you’re not a fan of kung fu movies, most of the movie will go over your head and you’ll get to the end frustrated and feeling taunted. However, if you like superhero movies and can put up with the attitude problems the people making the movie have, it was entertaining.

Enchanted

Enchanted
a fairy tale movie
IMDb | Netflix | Amazon
Overall Rating: 5/10
Meets Expectations: +0
Apparent Rating: 5/10

I kind of enjoyed Enchanted. Except I hated the supposedly good characters and was therefore bored enough to be doing something else while watching. Even with my hands busy and my brain distracted, I noticed enormous glaring plotholes. A huge part of the premise of the movie is that “fairy tales can come true” but the writing seems to indicate that fairy tales are idiotic and non-sensical.

In many ways, what made this movie worth watching is how the elements of fairy tales are satirized with a completely straight face. It definitely is a comedy, but only if you are well-versed in Disneyfied fairy tales. For example, the Princess sings a non-verbal melody and all the little woodland creatures come to help her. When the Princess is in New York City, all the little creatures come to help her because of the power of her voice. That is a dark magic, compulsion, and it’s illustrated by having cockroaches climb out of the tub drain and eat mildew. Most of the romantic fairy tale elements are shown in a slightly twisted kind of way. The writers were clearly poking fun at fantasy.

In that way it reminds me of the Amanda Bynes movie, Sydney White. Since Enchanted borrows from several fairy tales, it works as a parody of the genre quite well. (Sydney White was a modern remake of Snow White, without really drawing that connection for viewers.) In a number of scenes, Enchanted reminded me of the one Bollywood movie I watched (loathsome! unmentionably loathsome) because of the musical nature.

One caveat for the movie is its combined nature, the first segment is animated, then the animated Princess is exiled to real world New York City and shows up looking like a stoned idiot. The Princess is saved because the guy’s daughter believes in fairy tales and makes him help her. Normally when children are used as plot devices, it is about an unwanted pregnancy or a demonstration of the evil nature of the villain. So that was intriguing, but only in an intellectual way. The actress playing the daughter is not the next Dakota Fanning.

The whole movie is mediocre if you watch it straight up, if you watch it as a tongue-in-cheek satire of a genre, it’s rather amusing in an annoying way. But those aims work at cross-purposes. It is impossible to suspend disbelief while the movie is laughing at itself. It is impossible to tolerate the common plot elements from fairy tales as portrayed without it.

I think it could have been a decent fantasy drama. I think it could have been a decent comedy (though it would have seemed like a Shrek rip-off in many ways.) What it ended up being was mediocre.

Arabian Nights

Arabian Nights
a movie
IMDb | Netflix | Amazon
Overall Rating: 7/10
Meets Expectations: -1
Apparent Rating: 6/10

Arabian Nights is a much more classical version of the story than my previous exposure. But the movie was uneven. I should say that this was flagged as television, and it definitely smacks of “made for TV”.

There were three stories told inside a framework of reality. The first story was really good, the Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves one. The second story was supposed to be funny but I am not so good with humor and tend to be rather appalled. The third story was the Aladdin one and really managed to be both dull and rather offensive. The framework story, of a sultan who thinks he should kill his wife before she kills him because all women are monstrous… that started to get interesting toward the end and I really enjoyed its conclusion. It seemed like fantasy and reality were competing in this and as reality developed texture and color beyond paranoia, the fantasy started to lose strength.

The acting in this is bad. It’s comical and done in the style of Hercules: The Legendary Journeys. It’s supposed to look a bit jarring and off-kilter because the audience is supposed to think the actors don’t take this seriously. It’s supposed to add a dimension by breaking the fourth wall. To me it always looks unprofessional and childish.

So, there’s a made-for-TV movie, with that kind of production values and budget, which used great source material and dumbed it down so it fits between commercial breaks. There were some modern references that I found really disruptive. Genie of the Ring says, “You wouldn’t hit a man wearing whatever these are, right?” he points to his face where he’s wearing glasses. That’s not funny, it causes my suspension of disbelief to completely falter.

There were no subtitles. I enjoyed this, but not as much as I would have if the people involved in making it had actually done their jobs. Given how much I enjoyed the reality framework story and the Ali Baba story, it seems like this could have been a 10/10 movie. To my mind, there should be a penalty for doing a mediocre job with a great idea, thus wasting the idea.

Cruel Zinc Melodies — Glen Cook (fantasy)

Cruel Zinc Melodies
a fantasy book by Glen Cook
Amazon
Overall Rating: 5/10
Meets Expectations: +1
Apparent Rating: 4/10

There are a number of books in Glen Cook’s Garrett PI series. They are all adjectival metallic nouns. Cold Copper Tears, Cruel Zinc Melodies, Silver something. Whatever. Generally these foci are forced into the story and we’re made to put up with it. I can see it being a useful method for writing a series because the author can use it to hold things together. I really hate it when the technique is obvious though.

The main character used to be downtrodden and put upon and can’t seem to get past that. It’s really irritating to have someone who knows the chief of law enforcement, the heir to the throne, the best telepathic monster, a team of fairies, the head of the were rats, the biggest heads of the criminal underworld, the driving forces behind the biggest manufacturing enterprises, someone in every branch of the military, the best accountants, the royal tailor, the best security people… if there is someone at the top of any heap, Garrett knows him. And the guy cannot stop whining. He also can’t stop referring to himself in the third person–romance manner. (In romances, there’s this stylized referenced manner, people aren’t referred to by name but by descriptor. The red-headed lady. And because that can’t be constantly repeated like a pronoun, there are endless variants… Titian-maned, crimson locks, ginger girl, whatever. It’s always clear the writer bit off too much thesaurus and is burping it back.) Garrett refers to himself as “Mother Garrett’s Blue Eyed Boy” Or Mama G’s or Ma Garrett’s or whatever variant. I wanted to get in Mr Cook’s face and say “emulating pulp romances is a step down! Stop it.”

These are all irritations. But it’s been years since the previous book. And I spent the whole book trying to remember what was so interesting about these books. I liked it. But I have no idea why. If you are not a desperate fan, don’t bother.

The plot was really strange because about halfway through the narrator (who is Garrett having hindsight) said they should have been able to solve the mystery since they had all the information. Only the way the ending went, they didn’t. I think. I was amazed Garrett could follow along with the plot. He doesn’t seem that bright.

In summary, drunken asshole makes good, can’t seem to appreciate that, and story magically works out while idiot tells us we’re the stupid ones.

Heroes Adrift — Moira J. Moore (fantasy)

Heroes Adrift
a fantasy book by Moira J. Moore
Author’s Site | Amazon
Overall Rating: 8/10
Meets Expectations: +0
Apparent Rating: 8/10

Books seem to be much more about personal preference, I have higher expectations from the authors than I have been trained to expect from popular films. Heroes Adrift is the third in the series, and I liked it better than the second one. I liked it a little better than the first one just because it’s here now.

One of the things I really like is how bumbling the main characters are. Unlike a lot of fantasy series, especially the paranormal/urban kinds, the main characters do not get new god-like skills in every volume. They struggle through new situations and they learn from those things. But it’s not that they can solve the problem on their own, it’s more that they’ve learned who to contact in law enforcement when they have an important clue. Sure they have a few extra quirks so we know why the books are about them instead of other people they meet, but they don’t seem like things other people couldn’t have because the gods have a limited number of blessings to hand out.

What interested me about the books is the way the characters are paired up permanently but it’s not about sex, it’s about magic. I really liked that after a long batch of romances. That means there absolutely has to be a story and the plot and characters cannot just be glossed over. What was unfortunate here was that they decided to have a sexual relationship during this third book and it didn’t work for me. Not that they’re having a relationship at all, despite the conflict, but because it’s not written into the pages. It wasn’t hot, it didn’t seem sexy, and it really didn’t seem like they liked it all that much.

Some of the problems were in how there is a lot of detail about the world, but not enough of it was reiterated here. A lot of it was, parts where they summed up the plots, but not the parts where it’s explained how the main character doesn’t need to worry about contraception even though women around her do. So there were a lot of details that just didn’t track for me. I remember that being an issue with the previous books. So I have it in my head that the author isn’t very good at world building.

I liked the magic system in these books. Because it was clear why this magic was essential and important, but the effects were limited and far-reaching. I liked the economics described in the series and how they were differentiated when the main characters went away to another country.

There is a lot to like in this series, and not much to dislike seriously. Sure I think they could be better books, but this is not the heyday of fantasy fiction publishing when there are a thousand new titles per year. There really isn’t a lot out there that’s better than these are.

Kitty Takes a Holiday — Carrie Vaughn (fantasy)

Kitty Takes a Holiday
a fantasy book by Carrie Vaughn
Wiki | Publisher’s Site | Amazon
Overall Rating: 6/10
Meets Expectations: +1
Apparent Rating: 7/10

I loathed the second book in this series, Kitty Does DC Goes To Washington, with the author’s description of a gorgeous man as merely “Brazilian” as if all Brazilian men are the kinds who are featured on pin-up calendars of soccer players… as if “Brazilian” isn’t a type of pubic wax job. So I figured the guy was old, wrinkly, and midget-size…. I’m thinking Tattoo from Fantasy Island twenty-five years later and the author was thinking “dark-haired Fabio”. We were told that Kitty has self-respect, but she takes her Brazilian to bed right away because she can’t resist him since he’s a lycanthrope too— but he’s a were-jaguar and you wouldn’t think wolves and jaguars would mate in the wild, right? So why was her attraction uncontrollable? I really lost all respect for the author. I swore off any other books she might write. I didn’t even consider buying the third book.

The library had the book. It taunted me.

So I took it home and read it. Kitty only f**ks one guy in this book and it costs her a long-time friend. But mostly what made this so much better than the previous book is that it actually is all about her when she thinks it is. And even when the problems are about her, she’s thinking about someone besides herself. So when the author tells us that Kitty is a great person who cares about her friends and her fans, it’s somewhat believable, for once. When we’re told that Kitty has suffered, we’re actually shown some of her suffering, for once. We don’t see Kitty get viciously raped then get up and walk away but get told that she’s broken up about it.

Maybe I liked this book because it was largely about how vicious and horribly intolerant Christians are while claiming they’re nice people (they accidentally summoned a demon while trying to force a well-mannered lycanthrope from her home). That usually improves my opinion of a book.

Overall, it was a pleasant read. If the first two books had started like this one, I might not have such a horrible impression. I still doubt I will ever buy any more of Ms. Vaughn’s books since we don’t share a common vocabulary (“Brazilian!” “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”) And we don’t seem to share an understanding of what normal people consider normal behavior. So when Kitty behaves bizarrely or immorally, I’m expecting an explanation in the text from the author and it’s never there. I guess maybe the author is much younger than I am and thinks women act like they act on the television– like sluts and whores— so no explanation is needed because it’s not werewolf behavior, it’s ordinary.

I liked it surprisingly well. I think other people would consider it an average book for the genre.

Queen of Dragons — Shana Abe (fantasy / romance?)

Queen of Dragons
a book by Shana Abe
Author’s Site | Amazon
Overall Rating: 6/10
Meets Expectations: -2
Apparent Rating: 4/10

Perhaps I have strange expectations, but I tend to think books in series should get better. With more familiarity to the world the author has set up, the reader is free to concentrate on the increased attention to characterization and plot. Frequently books in a series actually decline in readability. That was the case with Abe’s “Drakon” books.

I read The Smoke Thief and The Dream Thief and thought they were tolerable if you like those Victorian-set rape-romances where because women have no rights, the man insists and marries her in some pretty ceremony then he doesn’t need her consent anymore. The dragon and shapechanging aspects of this particular world were interesting and they seemed to give the women some inherent power they would otherwise lack. But power in and of itself seemed to cause their confinement because the strongest female Drakon would be mated to the strongest male Drakon. I have zero understanding of this kind of civilization. I have zero understanding as to why women would endure it. But I find it really repulsive that some woman would write about this as a form of erotica.

With that background, it doesn’t shock anyone that I did not particularly enjoy Queen of Dragons. In this book, a female who is the de facto head of the Slavic Drakon (though women can’t lead there either) decides to leave for some random reason and goes to the English Drakon, who proceed to strip her of her rights and powers and demand she mate with their leader who is merely a figurehead while the council does all the real decision-making. She keeps insisting that she’s a king just like he is. She keeps insisting that she’s better than a mere woman. But she lets herself be captured so the man can save her.

There is some unexplained funny business with sleep “flying” that never gets explained. There’s some plot with spies and evil humans, but we don’t see it and it’s never explained. It really seems like “These are some things with plot. I’m going to mention them so you know this could be a real book, but instead I concentrated on the romance angle.” But the sex scenes are also vague and I did not see any sort of romance. The Drakon figure-head likes her because she keeps trying to get away and he gains some minimal respect for her abilities but mostly he knows his life will go easier if he does what the council wants him to do. That didn’t seem very romantic to me.

If I lived in a world with Victorian expectations, I would be lifting weights, taking martial arts, practicing with weaponry, and conditioning my body so I could fight. If I could shapeshift into a dragon, I doubt I would put up with being stripped of my rights. I found that I had no respect for this supposedly powerful dragon-woman because she did nothing with her power to save herself and she did nothing to help anyone else who was being abused by the situation.

Americans seem to be rather appalled by Muslim women who wear veils, I hear people saying that women shouldn’t let themselves be degraded by society’s expectations that women are inferior. But we are not so far from that, though apparently far enough that books celebrating the English oppression of women are best-selling hardcovers.

I will not be reading another of these. The writing was tolerable, the story is typical “romance” quality, the “erotic” parts were about as well done as other popular books of the genre. The shapeshifting parts were okay. There is obviously a lot of research done into an historical era. The book isn’t bad per se, I just find its celebration of the oppression of women to be anathema.